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*walks into his temporary quarters after a heavy workout and a shower, a towel draped over his neck, glancing out at the bright Tahiti sunlight... he wants missions like these more often, especially when Lee and Tenten get to come along as part of his cover story*

*eyedart left and right, opens a secret panel and checks his journal, which is hidden away along with other proof of his identity*

..Hm, the students will be enjoying the beginning of their much-needed break this week, gathering their strength and TAKING PART IN THE FESTIVITIES OF THEIR YOUTH... I hope the presents I sent have all arrived on--


Wait -- casualties at Hogsmeade? Death Eaters!? WHAT'S GOING ON??

[[Gai's gift-list will be coming up soon when I manage to write it. For now, they are delayed in the owl post. And YOSH, I'm back! Will be posting with the rest of my characters within the next few days.]]
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IMMENSE THANKS to whomever sent me this emergency yodel button!! It will be a perfect way to send signals to my flying students -- much better than a simple whistle!

Hmmm.... with the grounds this icy, it's difficult to perform my daily run... but I will not be thwarted. If the ground is icy, I will simply have to work on my balance. And for every time -- no, if, by chance, I should happen to fall, I will do an extra lap around the castle!! That's a PROMISE!!!


..I'd better check the roofs on the secret tunnels again, especially the ones the students know about. Ground shifts in weather like this and those shoring spells won't hold them forever.


[[Not really quite back yet, three exams to go, BUT I PWND MY TORTS EXAM TODAY SO WE'RE GETTING THERE. XD And the button Gai got from the King of All Cosmos is a MAGICAL one, so... just imagine it's higher in pitch and much, much louder. \o7]]
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[[Filtered to Hel]]

Let me know how your detention progresses. And remember -- don't set anything on fire!!


..AUGH!!! I don't know how I'm ever going to get this stuff out of my hair! It had better be washable, Zidane, or I'm going for a dunk in the lake AND TAKING YOU WITH ME!!!

I hope all of you had as fabulous a Halloween as I did. Flying classes will resume on Monday before breakfast, so everybody be ready. And be sure to wear your House scarves. The Quidditch pitch can be chilly at that time of day!

[[Gai was among those leading students through Zidane's Haunted House. The marshmallow slugs paid him extra attention.]]
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Yosh -- listen up, Hogwarts! It is finally time to reveal the AWESOME POWER OF THE SHAKESPEARIAN THESPIAN ..what... I mean, the news you've all been waiting for!

I, the wizarding world's GLORIOUS PROUD GREEN BEAST, am no longer your Charms TA. That post has been given back to Zidane Tribal, who SHALL BE KNOWN AS DARTH nonono, who just arrived from THE NEW YORK COMICON TO SAY... wait, is my journal acting up again? *sound of the journal being whacked with his wand* ..But never fear; I am not going away! Instead, from henceforward, I will START AND NEVER STOP ..well, that, too....

I AM THE NEW FLYING TEACHER FOR FIRST THROUGH FOURTH YEARS!!! *stares suspiciously, then draws a thumbs-up as he sees there are no more extraneous words* So you will all get to meet me on the Quidditch pitch BRIGHT AND EARLY next week for your first lesson!!

*throws open the door to his old quarters in the teachers' wing, only to find....*
..I see Halloween started a little early in my room, eh? AHAHAHAHAHAReducto! Reducto!! ..hah, that takes care of them.... come my mail wasn't forwarded again? So many letters -- hmm.... *shuffling paper* ..wait, this isn't addressed to me--


[[Cleared with Gau-mun. This is clearly going to lead to madcap hijinks. XDDD And all those very readable strikeouts are derived from HERE. *dies laughing*]]
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..All right, who turned the world upside down!? >O

And why is there a little symbol floating below my head?? :[

HAH!! 8D It must be an April First joke!!! \o7 Ahahahaha, the things people come up with!!! ^__^d Although if Professor McGonagall ever finds out who turned her hair pink, I don't give much for the poor bloke's chances.... x_X

[[Private note to Lee: attached]]
[[Private note to Lee's mum: dispatched by owl]]
[[Private Howler to Dumbledore: will unfortunately be opened in his office, out of sight]]


An assignment over the weekend... I should have expected it after this dry spell. There will barely be enough time to get there from this week's last training session in London. But this is not a good time to leave Lee alone.....

..Life would be simpler if nobody had to pay bills. Or if there were no international crime lords to chase around the world.

But then... life would not be such a CHALLENGE!!!!


[[Yet another victim of Watari -- as well as an unknown prankster. Feel free to spot Gai walking briskly on the ceiling, or even to take credit for this particular prank, though gravity reversal is probably a higher-level bit of magic. XDDD]]
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These flowers and colors bring a lively touch of springtime to our admittedly musty, winter-darkened corridors! HOWEVER. It is an undeniable fact that THE PROUD GREEN BEAST OF HOGWARTS IS NOT PINK. At least, not this sort of pale, pastel pink. Or pale pastel blue. Or pale pastel yellow. Or especially pale, pastel aquamarine.



HAH, that worked sort of. No meek, pale colours for my zealous spirit -- the long, dark winter is slipping away and this is the time to charge headlong into a glorious new season of HOPE!!! *PROUD GREEN MULTICOLOURED POSE*

[[Not content with the exploding egg, Gai managed to charm his hair and robes to flash primary colors like a strobe light. Enjoy.]]
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*finishes writing his thank-yous just as the train pulls up onto the castle grounds*

Notes to Mikage, Hirako, Vivi, Emilia, Sophie, Rinali, Misa, Ikki, and Hinata )

AHAHAHA, I finally have time to look at my journal! HELLO, HOGWARTS!!!~ *PROUD GREEN POSE* This month has been so busy that I have barely been able to snatch time to write -- but I PASSED MY STEALTH AND TRACKING PRACTICALS and now there's only Piffle and Circumspection before the midwinter term is over!! HEY, EVERYBODY!!! *SHINY GRIN* What have you all been up to lately?

A brief stop in my quarters, and then there will be just time to touch bases with everyone befo--

..but... but wait....



[[Notes are only visible to the people therein addressed. And feel free to have seen the graffiti before Gai gets rid of it!]]
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Ah, 2007. I have never had such a full, active year except for those heady days of '97.... Its changes, its challenges, the terror and beauty of the passing of time... Goodbye, 2007, we knew ye well!! And hello to the brand new year which even now rolls onto our calendars! 2008 -- ah, 2008!! What MYSTIC CHORDS OF FORTITUDE AND GRACE are heralded by this brand new calendar page? By the London parades on these cold, damp nights?

I know one thing and one thing only.

As one year ends, another begins. I've lived every second of 2007 to the limit, but NO MORE. This... is the END. And as I put one year behind me, another begins anew!!! Today marks another blazing milestone in magical history, for the Wizarding World's prideful green Auror trainee has NOW TURNED NINETEEN!!!! *PROUD GREEN POSE*

..and we have a stealth training practical today. So I have to spend my birthday in a state of utter invisibility.


But if it gets me closer to my goal, IT'S WORTH IT!!!

[[Backdated to New Year's Day. Happy birthday to Gai!]]
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*words are coming a bit faster than he can scribble, but he does his best*


I feel like dancing -- SINGING -- SHOUTING OUT MY DYNAMIC ENTHUSIASM FROM THE TOP OF BIG BEN!! The world is spinning at a thousand miles an hour and the sunlit hours of our lives are FLASHING BY, and as we hurtle through the universe on this precious jewel of a planet, I can dimly sense the incredible marvels that lurk just in the future, barely out of reach of our yearning fingers!! It is time to stand up and seize the day -- to capture the wonders that are to come!!! For the celebration of YOUTH is a celebration of LIFE....


..Ikki... what is IN these drinks!???

And points if you get what he's sort of quoting!]]
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Whistling cheerfully, Gai was hanging paper lanterns in the hall. And there were lots and lots of them. If he liked one thing best about this festival, it was that it was SHINY. )

Already he had written several thank-yous, dispatching them by Floo and by wing....

Owl to Rinali )
Owl to Ikki )
Owl to Shin )
Owl to Kakashi )

..and even as he watched the last one vanish into the dusk, here came another!! And it looked like... it was carrying... yes, something interes--

..a CRAB!???

[[This is by way of being a comment area to start off anything that ends up happening at Gai's flat over the holidays. ^^ Feel free to have your character swing round London way and drop in!]]
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*strides up a Hong Kong street at five in the morning, whistling and carrying his rucksack and far too cheerful and alert for the time of day*

*finished his mission a day ahead of schedule, got all his reports in and owled off everyones' presents, and is on his way uptown to surprise TenTen and Lee*

*ah, life is good~*

Gai's Incredible and Amazing Gift List )

[[Gai has been out of touch and hasn't received any mail yet, but will do tomorrow or thereabouts. ^^ Jumping on the bandwagon to say that if I've missed anyone who should be on Gai's list, give me a poke!]]
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Hah, Jiraya's doing fine after all!! *lets the thumb-sized frog hop out onto his hand* Egad, you haven't half made a mess of your terrarium.... I shall have to do something about that....

It is strange to be back in London!! The fog is cold and wet, but all the snow has turned to slush under the wheels of the city traffic. How I envy my comrades back at Hogwarts, in the mountains of Scotland where the snow is still pristine!!! HAVE A GREAT HOLIDAY, EVERYBODY -- REMEMBER TO THROW SOME SNOWBALLS FOR ME!!!!

Aaaah, I always forget the presents people give this time of year!! But I have two hours in London before the Portkey to Konoha. I shall have to make those hours COUNT!!!

..How is everything going?

[[Filtered to Emilia]]

Did you get home safely?? Give my regards to Sir Integra! I was sorry to see she had to go back so soon.


[[Backdated to right after the train ride. First strike GONE; second strike filtered to Neji, Tenten, and Sakura; and if your character is in London, feel free to run into him. ^^]]
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Private, 30% hackable to friends )

[[Filtered to Sakura]]

How are you settling in again? *GRINS*


WATCH OUT FOR THE MISTLETOE -- it's sticking people together again!!! Hey, Sgt. Johnson, have you tried putting a magical marker spell on the hexed clumps, so people can readily avoid them if they choose?

And... ZELKOVA!! I hope you're ready for today's encounter!!!

[[Gai was theoretically here during last year's mistletoe attack, though I hadn't joined the game yet, so he's not too surprised at what's going on. Strikes are altogether illegible. Your regularly scheduled dosage of DYNAMIC YOUTH will very shortly be back to full force!]]
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No Portkey available today. But I will not be late while I have a broomstick!! BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. ..I saw the train while I was flying north.... what's it doing making a trip at this time of year? Supplies? A new teacher?? Good grief, I hope no one else got hurt....

[[Filtered to Neji]]

This is another new journal, so maybe it will actually work and you will be able to read this.



[[Filtered to TenTen]]

My journal blew up and I did not receive your latest messages. What is going on?



I should talk to the Counselor. The Ministry has pamphlets about depression, but they are too general to be any use. If it's this bad, I cannot fail him through incomplete understanding. I... as much as I care about him, I cannot do this alone....

This has gone far beyond poor Neji. Ah, my Lee... loss and rejection have ruled his young life. His foster parents, resenting his magical disability. His best friend... disappearing for years, trying to kill him, and then disappearing again after they'd reconciled.... other friends leaving, one by one... perhaps only his youthful spirit sustained him for this long.... confound the Ministry, keeping me back in London after the paperwork was in already.... ..does he think that even I will leave him? These wounds are so deep, so deep....

I can't lose him....


Only another week, then the winter break and we will -- but...

*swears blackly, then covers the words with a heavy strikeout when he realizes what he's said*

That assignment.... I had forgotten.....

[[Due to ministry work and his all too convenient journal malfunctions, Gai has NO CLUE what has been happening since he left Hogwarts on Wednesday. He will be arriving on the castle grounds as you read this, nearly frozen solid from flying all the way to Scotland in the dead of winter, visibly shaken by Lee's recent signs of major depression, and with his hair significantly shorter in front. Rose, Jen, Cella, Kris, EMAIL MEEEE!~]]
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[[unhackable, on a security-charmed paper tucked away in his journal]]

Of all people, to take advice from him... but it's true. If my journals always go wrong, they're not secure enough to trust with what's important -- like mysteries and apologies and Lee and Neji's safety. Madame Vance still doesn't know who the pit was intended for. We've all taken dangerous and sensitive assignments. It might have been them. It might have been me. If she finds paper airplanes in there, I shall EXPLODE.

A few hours of patrolling, and then.....


Everyone who still likes zombie movies after that last one egad.... you should know that REAL zombies are VERY DIFFERENT from the ones on the computer screen!!! They're called Inferi, and an Inferius is a very scary thing... a dead person without a mind or a heart, completely controlled by somebody steeped in Dark magic! *sepulchural voice* But if you see an Inferius stalking the noble corridors of Hogwarts today, do not be afraid, for the Proud Green Inferius of Hogwarts answers to nobody except Sgt. Johnson, and is sworn to protect this castle and its occupants from BEYOND. THE. GRAVE. MWAHAHAHAHAHA.

Filtered to Kakashi )

Filtered to Ahiru )

Filtered to Haruko )

*feels his way out into the hall* ..AAAAUUUUGH, I CAN'T SEE!!!!

[[Hello, candygram prank. XD Not that Gai minds much -- he's experienced enough English Halloweens to consider this part of the fun. Now watch him bump into everyone in the castle FOR GREAT JUSTICE! Strikes, btw, are erased right out of the journal.]]
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Thank goodness I didn't throw it away after all....

[[Filtered to third-years and up]]


Did you know they don't let the Ministry screen a lot of the really great Muggle horror movies because the werewolf and vampire lobbies put the bite on them don't like it!? WHOA, WHO KNEW??? But here's the good part: our Muggle Relations professor is having some of us participate in a scary movie night before Halloween, and I got permission to leave my other journal in the theater so we can watch it from here!!!!

And what a movie it is, too. Terror! Horror!! ROMANCE! And plenty of RIP-ROARING ACTION!! Two hours of your day, and a memory that will HAUNT YOU. *creeeepy letters* For ALL ETERNITY. Come to the Defense classroom if you dare, and experience the horror classic of a lifetime: A ZOMBIE STOLE MY HEART!!!


[[Following the popular idea that journals can be used to transmit moving images as well as words, Gai has managed to arrange for a zombie movie to be screened at Hogwarts. 'A Zombie Stole My Heart' is not a real movie, but one can imagine it contains all the trademark zombie tropes we know and love. Oh, and the journal picture might be a bit grainy, but that's a small price to pay for the EXPERIENCE OF A LIFETIME, right? XDDD]]
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[[Private, partially (and inadvertently) hackable to friends]]

AUGH. Training this week was more grueling than ever. I didn't even have a chance to work on tracing... well, Madame Vance has been looking at it. Maybe she had time.

Is it my imagination, or have some of the Hogwarts staff been acting a little bit... odd? Hexing one another in the courtyards -- they're supposed to be protectors and sources of inspiration for the youth under their care! What is this world coming to!?

Strange... how the world changes as one's youth passes by... Three years ago I would have laughed! But there's a point where laughter becomes cruelty. There was a time when I, too, took offense at the smallest slight to my honor. Sometimes, though.... sometimes the obvious answer makes things worse. I could get mad at him for being mad at me, but isn't it more important to remember that he's my friend?

Does that mean... I'm more mature than Kakashi???? *boggles*


Of all the strange holidays they observe in England, Halloween has got to be the best. Costumes, jokes, even more weirdness than usual, and a chance to face your darkest fears in a secure environment.... what's not to like? BE SAFE WITH YOUR PRANKS, PEOPLE! If it's fun, it should be fun for everyone, not just you. What better way to spread hilarity and joy?

Some of my London comrades are planning to celebrate with a scary movie night!! There's something I never did before! Ah, how I wish my good friends at Hogwarts could share this amazing experience!! Ooh, ooh!! Speaking of experiences, who else is helping with the haunTED HOUSE?????

*a few VERY LARGE scribbles, then something that sounds remarkably like a book being whacked repeatedly with a wand*

Gah, it's doing it again! My journal is JINXED!! JINXED, I SAY!!! Aaaaugh, why me? I thought I got rid of my journal problems when I THREW THE LAST ONE OUT.

[[Strike = absolutely unhackable.]]
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*has been in the library for ten hours straight, pretending he can concentrate on NEWTs studies*


Mother's Day.... a time for remembrance as well as celebration, I suppose. It would be nice if I could remember anything at all from those days, when I was too young to understand where she went. Somewhere in the world, there must be mothers who are long-lived and good-hearted. Maybe someday I'll meet one.

I should have known McGonagall would find out about my Transfiguration experiments, especially after that little spell of invisibility. *chagrined* It was nice of her to substitute helping Shuichi with his Animagus form for a real detention. Heigh-ho, tomorrow I'll see if my theories have held up through the latest rewrite.

Right now, though, there's more pressing business to attend to!!


Attention, Hogwarts, Suzaku just found Himawari's journal in the library!! If you know where Himawari is, tell her the journal's been found!!!!

[[Filtered to Hufflepuffs]]

Has anyone seen Himawari for the last day or so?

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Tar and feathers... peculiar creatures roaming the halls... odd effects from pranked comestibles.... yes, this has been an interesting April First.

[[Filtered to Professor Jackson]]

Professor -- you said you had a minute? *digging in his pocket for THE ARTIFACT OF D00M*


[[Backdated to whenever Gai met with Professor Jackson. Oh, and if you didn't get to Sakura's party last night, just step back in time to when it's still going on! XD]]
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Ah, 'tis the season for japes, jests, and all manner of well-meaning foolery. In other words, it's business as usual around here. WILL SOMEONE HELP ME GET THIS FISH OFF MY BACK!?



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Maito Gai

March 2009

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